Hello again, Spacious Chad's readers. I hope none of you have presumed me dead, for I am alive and so are my back appendages (which seem to have their own consciousness). So, what's new this week?
The Democratic Party has managed to completely blow a chance at impeachment, by a factor of nine of the fuckers. Hey, good for them. They probably got some real good secret money for that bit of farsighted enlightenment. Why impeach the president for unnecessarily killing thousands upon thousands of innocent women and children in a country that has never attacked us, ever? I mean, it wasn't a great idea, I guess, in retrospect. But then, who saw this horrible fiasco coming at the time?
Oh wait, it was anyone with a basic knowledge of history or rudimentary psychology, sociology, or common sense, or even just a person who thought about it for a single second. Well, fuck me!
Still, it's not as bad as a blowjob*.
At least, Alberto "I agree with you Mr. President we should torture as many Arabs as possible and then constantly deny that we are doing it, even as we are setting them free for not actually committing any crimes" Gonazales is poised to step down due to the usual Four-Years-Too-Late bout of media criticism. Seriously, how does it take them four fucking years to figure this out? They write the news every day for fuck's sake, you'd think they'd learn something from it. That's the word of the day: fuck.
Not "fuck" like, "Let's go fuck, Baby." Just, "Fuck!"
As in, "Fuck! I just spilled anchovie salad all over myself and now a trained attack dog is growling at my nether regions!" kind of Fuck.
But, hey, I'm sorry. There's more to life than just politics and wondering how to apply for citizenship in Canada. It's just that I'm not sure what it is, exactly. Maybe it has something to do with puppies or kittens? Or any of the more unlucky species of creatures being systematically wiped off of the earth?
God damn. My medication isn't working today. Sorry, everybody. I will return Wednesday.
